Wednesday, August 29, 2018

Welcome Kam Andreessen

The Primulus Post would like to welcome archeologist Kam Andreessen to the universe of natural technology.

Transported to the alternate Post-Apocalyptic timeline through accidental contact with Clarisa Gunnarsson's emergency port necklace, Kam not only survived until his rescue by our very own Gabriel, but also discovered he is a mage, his latent genes having been activated due to extended residence in PAH.

Given the choice of either staying in PAH or returning, powerless, to Azul (where he would have had his memories wiped and been stripped of his abilities), Kam chose to stay in PAH, where he lives with his wife, a neko by the name of Minnie.

Kam has been instrumental in the rebuilding of PAH Earth, to the point of even integrating local Vrol populations into society (e.g. they don't eat people anymore).

"Kam has worked hard to rebuild this world, and, in truth, has gotten closer than any Primulus in creating a society like that which we had originally intended: a thriving community that avails itself of both human and natural technology," said Gabriel, brother of Mija-El and Commander of Jah's Celestial Forces, in an interview at the Hub. When pressed for more information, Gabriel stated he had to leave, as yet another humanoid species (this one residing in the Sombrero Galaxy) had developed atomic weapons, and was about the annihilate itself through sheer stupidity. He further detailed that he had to give them "a cosmic bitch slap" and knock them back to the stone-age, lest they destroy entire planetary bodies and throw their solar system into a collision course with a neighboring system.

Prime Angel Tours provides excursions to PAH, and if you go there, with just a bit of luck (and maybe some inherent magic), you could possibly meet Kam and his lovely wife. When there, be sure to stop at Seven Sins, the local hotpsot, and have a blonde beer with a bit of tomato juice—Lennie Johnson's favorite beverage.

Oh, and Lennie's a vampire. But vamps are nice in PAH. Honest.

We made them that way.